I had another private psych hospital admission.. But this time it lasted for a month. I was having troubles with dealing with the fact that my father refused to see or hasn’t contacted me in a year and I didn’t want to be “alone” because I wasn’t feeling safe. It was a voluntary admission that lasted longer than expected but I’m okay now, on new medication and getting there slowly. I made new friends and got fucked over by my psych so I have to find yet another one.. Frustrating! (I think I may have it sorted though).
As for my father, Yes some of the reasons of why he doesn’t want any contact is my fault but I thought maybe that would have changed by now…
I still agree with my last post..where I told you all he has bipolar disorder and doesn’t seek help (that I know of anyway) & believes that I’m the only one in the family with Mental Health issues…SIGH.
I have given up on trying to make any contact with him because it’s useless because he never responds and he still treats me as if I’m 16.. not 26. Everything has to go his way or else world war three will take place, in his mind anyway.. He says that he doesn’t blame me or anyone else but towards the end the blame is always directed towards me..
If he decides to call me sometime asking for forgiveness or whatever, he’s lost his chance because I don’t give second chances. This doesn’t indicate that I’m suicidal or anything..I’m not, I’m just over my father for good.
He had his chance and lost it a year ago.
I know he loves me, but he doesn’t like me for who I am and that’s hurtful more than anything.
Stay tuned for more posts, I’m sure they’ll be happier in the near future.